Mr. President Grabs a Bite Out of Alcatraz with Gator Face-Off

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Sources say the former president was spotted on a boat near the infamous island prison, where he allegedly tried throw somebits to a massive alligator. Witnesses claim that Trump maybe got a little overly familiar with the creature, leading some whispering. The {entireaffair was captured on video, and the footage have rapidly gone viral online.

Breaking News: The Donald and the Danger Lizards!

A shocking development is unfolding at Mar-a-Lago as we speak/right now/at this very moment. Sources report that former President The Donald has faced off against a pack of super creepy lizards, said to be mutated by radiation/the result of government experiments/escaped from Area 51.

A nervous pool boy claim to have seen the former leader grappling with the creatures, wielding a vibrating toothbrush. The situation is still developing/unfolding/sketchy, and we await official statements from a bewildered Secret Service agent.

Stay tuned for more updates on this bizarre event!

Big T's Wild Tour of Alcatraz

Get ready for a wild ride, folks! Tweeter-in-Chief is hitting the rock/island/prison like never before in a tour/experience/adventure they're calling the Gator Gauntlet. Sources say he's planning on showing off/lecturing about/taking control of the island, wearing a MAGA hat the whole time. He's even said he will put in a gold-plated bidet during his visit. This ain't your grandma's tour of Alcatraz, folks. Brace yourselves!

Gator Jail? Definitely, Declares the Donald

Folks, lemme tell ya somethin'. That mess down in Florida is gettin' out of hand. They got these alligators runnin' amok. And what do they do? Nothing! They just let 'em cruise around. But not me, I wouldn't stand for that. We gotta get tough of these creatures. That's why I say we gotta build a gator jail - Alcatraz for crocodiles, folks! That's what makes America great, takin' dealin' with the tough stuff.

Bigly Donald's Wild Ride: Presidential GATOR Safari!

This ain't your typical campaign rally, folks. The Commander-in-Chief himself is hitting the swamps on a wild adventure. That's right, we're talking about Trumpbattling beastly reptiles. Sources say he's packing his that ridiculous red "Make America Great Again" beanie and planning on showing those gators who's boss. Will he make a deal with the biggest gator in the swamp? Only time will tell!

This Is Crazy! Trump Goes Cage Diving With Gators

Folks, you are seriously gonna believe this! The Donald himself, strange political news previous Prez Trump, has decided to take a wild expedition. He's trading his golf clubs for some serious courage and is jumping into a tank full of vicious alligators! Rumor has it that this whole thing was his idea.

What could possibly be more wild? Only time will tell.

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